No posts for over a month reflecting yet another of those recurrent periods of uncertainty as to why maintain a - this, in particular - blog.
Without boring the few stalwarts & all faithfuls who might still be reading, the doubts come under these general headings:
1) might there be other more effective forms of social media? (Twitter & Instagram, for example, have been suggested to me).
2) might the moment have passed there being just so much talk & garbage out there? Go back ten years or so & there seemed to be a space of permission & possibility worth investigating. Now, in 2017, who needs it? I wonder whether a similar doubt has led the likes of Ron Silliman, John Latta, Kate Greenstreet to either completely or partially abandon the form (much to my regret).
3) might it have been but an excuse, a ruse, a form of evasion for really knuckling down & doing something more worthwhile?
4) might it have lost its sense of purpose? Originally it was a continuation of a correspondence related to poetry, a way of putting myself 'out there', of standing by one's words.
5) might it have lost its audience? Related to (4) above, there really was the hope (delusion?) that a dialogue would occur. And, to an extent, that did happen. But now?
6) might it have lost its focus? Little by little I've become aware of different people dropping by & therefore including certain kinds of post (as well as excluding others). There are times when I begin a post only to erase it thinking 'what happens if X reads this ...?'). Not just content but also the manner of writing becomes compromised.
7) might I have lost my focus? I sense how posts have veered off towards music reflecting a growing interests in modern classical composition (for want of a better term). But is this such a bad thing? Whereas the poetry posts have diminished. I'm still reading, for sure. However I am cagey about publishing my tentative readings. Why? Because I increasingly distrust such critical approaches. No, it's more I feel uncomfortable pushing it under people's noses. Plus, I am more & more of the opinion that the best 'reading' of another's work is the new writing it produces. And what of this? (Silence).
8) might it be laziness pure & simple? Hmmm ...
& yet ...
I am aware that this blog has been of use - perhaps introducing someone to a new book or CD or exhibition; perhaps infusing them with my own erratic enthusiasms; perhaps allowing the classroom experience to continue in another form; perhaps acting as a reassurance that I'm still around & things continue; perhaps leading to a new acquaintance ...
So. To be continued?